:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
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Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Bring me that man meat
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
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