I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
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