just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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