just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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