I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
