We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Randomize
