once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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