I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
