Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
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