I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
