maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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