YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
