Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
