So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize