I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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