if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize