...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
