Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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