clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
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