Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
