i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize