I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Randomize
