I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
