margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize