remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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