I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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