Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
