your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I wear drunk well.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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