Sry I called you an 8
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
