Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize