The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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