Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
