When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
