i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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