Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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