New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize