call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize