just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
