We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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