Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Just high enough for therapy.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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