HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable