Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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