Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
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