Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
