u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
