love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
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On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.