I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
