Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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