everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
