He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
