It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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