nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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