I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
